18 July 2008

I'll watch Project Runway so you don't have to. Again.

So I dunno. Mostly it seemed kind of old and stale. But not so bad like something you throw in the garbage. More like some chips you might still eat, but the whole time thinking, "Why am I eating these?" Maybe what you are saying right now. She is watching that Project Runway crap again? Didn't she write this already? Well, what the hell else you going to read then? You want more about front crossing again? Yeah, I didn't think so.

But what was sort of weird and nice, right in the beginning, we met this little blonde fella that has classic alien eyes and puffy puppy cheeks and the first thing he wanted was a tanning booth. And he looks like somethng that was constructed on a government base and shipped out to Project Runway under the guise of fashion designer. How weird is that? Like a CIA conspiracy, but why? Curious. And the next guy we met was some dad from Detroit. Like sort of this plain, basic, guy. And then it was Stella Ramone who makes leather rockstar corsets for Sebastian Bach. And is like a super downer, bummer man, dyed black hair sad eyes. A bunch of them were over 40. And a bunch weren't.

The thing that was happening was it seemed like the alien guy was the Christian. A whole buncha the girls were the Kit Pistols. There was a Sweet P and a Daniel Vosovic and a Jeffrey. And so on and so forth. Recycling. Austin Scarlett even came back for a minute. Super-recycling. Tim Gunn just kept looking like he wanted to cry. His brow was so furrowed. Like he wanted a snack with some carbs and a ride home.

Suede gave us a new word though. Wackadoodle. I believe I actually have said it 4 times, making it my word now. And Stella Ramone has the candycane striped leather pants we can't figure out, and the little spiked raccoon eyelashes that maybe are tattoos? She is an enigma sent from angels for our perusal. And the guy that got voted off, irritating, but what a way to go off, with this chainsaw massacre bride. Exactly how we used to dress up the cats as kids! Chainsaw bride had a weird off with the maxi pad mesh leotard sent by the CIA to the alien. The CIA gave him the dumbest catch phrase to make him the new Christian. What's going on with network tv and covert government operations. CIA, you reading this? I'm not repeating it. So there. Wackadoodle. Catch phrase my ass.


Elf said...

I zoom in right on the key word out of this whole thing: "Snack." Yes. I'm on my way to the kitchen right now.

Anonymous said...

what about all the unflattering shots of the women...crotch shot getting out of bed, thong ass, those stripy leggings (the joker??) and the butt pick. Thinking the person in the editing room has some issues.

Arm tattoo?? outside of arm, not so bad, inside of arm, kind of tender and ouchy.