16 July 2010

There were two choices at the swimming hole in the evening.

Throw the swimstick on the side with the headless squirrel with guts hanging out, or throw it on the side where Gustavo swims across to the big log and gets stuck there.

The headless squirrel was dead, if that makes any difference. Not wandering around like that. Also there was no indication of it being the work of a Friday the 13th slasher. Although it could have been. Since our recall level is Basic, there was chance of it not working around that squirrel. Advanced through Brilliant recalls totally work on squirrels, dead, alive, or undead, and the slashers that done the deed.

So we went to the getting stuck on the log side. Where Gustavo immediately swam across and got stuck on the log on the other side on the very first swimstick throw.

If he were a dog with a Brilliant recall, we wouldn't have to worry about him getting stuck on the other side of the creek or undead squirrel zombies rising from the leaf patch with their intestines flapping in the cool redwood breeze. Susan Garrett loves us very much so she made an online course to prevent this from happening that anybody can sign up for on her website. FOR A LIMITED TIME ONLY.

And if you don't chintz out for the basic rate, of $147 Canadian dollars, you can even talk to her on the phone. For $197 Canadian dollars. Or talk a lot, for $397.

You know what would be even better than sitting around waiting for the squirrel bodies to rise up and attacking the lycra ipod ear people that we bump into in the forest? Understanding the Susan Garrett marketing business plan of super genius. Instead of sitting around and thinking of a good idea like this, I was sitting in dirt thinking about where the squirrel's head went.

Then I watched Otterpop roll around in the dirt so all you could see were her eyeballs, sticking out of a dust patch.

Then I pretended to run away out of the forest to try to get Gustavo to jump in and swim across.

This worked really good, actually. It was free. It didn't get us Briliant level, but, you know.

It's just the way we do things.

5 comments:

MTWaggin said...

I Love It! Thanks for making me laugh once again! All the hoopla surrounding SGs ecourse (and my not having the time or money to do it) is getting a tad out of hand.

Elf said...

I think Gustavo does it deliberately.

sclmarm said...

We have had to do the "I'm leaving you forever on the other side of the river" to get Nub to swim back. No super de duper recall across the river here either:) Oh, and Nub, remember to bring your floaty toy back with you!!

Joanna said...

But... But... She "strongly recommends" paying more! And if you can talk on the phone, it will be like you really KNOW her. Like Ashton Kutcher and the tweeting about going out to get a salad!

If you choose "brilliant" pretty soon you'll be BFFs, and you'll drag your cellercisers next to each other and oh how you two will laugh and hold hands and your hair will BOUNCE as you become toned and brilliantly recalled. And then you'll go thrifting together and go back to the house and run 2x2s and then the two of you will answer the paid-for phone calls together.

This will come to pass. My Visa bill says so.

andrea said...

"Understanding the Susan Garrett marketing business plan of super genius. Instead of sitting around and thinking of a good idea like this, I was sitting in dirt thinking about where the squirrel's head went."

oh you are BRILLIANT - have no doubt of that - EVEH!!

(hey do you think it's coincidence my word to enter is DIEsk - imagine if it were diesg!!)