Well. I was gonna tell you about Dirt Nite (barking) and Gustavo's new tough love auntie who is driven more insane than me by his barking (way strict) who I now hear yelling back at him stuff like, "That's IT! I am giving Ruby (she means Otterpop, Ruby's been sitting in the car sleeping Dirt Nite off while she's lame, but hardly anyone can tell them apart) this cookie and you get NOTHING!" (cranky), and how after a bunch of courses, the dirt (damp) started clumping up in his soft small dog hair (close to dirt) and he had to sit down in the middle of the course, so upset with the dirt, and try to get it out (embarassing). Rendered weave poles done for the night due to bad hair issues. In most ways, Gustavo not a sensitive little princess, except for this thing he has with his HAIR!
Except I'm not telling you that. TSD reader Sarah sent me a sad news clip that Mickey Rourke's chihuahua died. Also she sent me easier bundt cake recipes. Did you ever see him on any post-Wrestler press junket news clips with Loki? Mickey, not bundt cake. Loki was a hundred year old chihuahua that he toted around everywhere. Big, tough, biker, smash face Mickey Rourke toting this ancient, creaky little sweater dog to every interview. I am pretty sure would have toted that little dog into the Oscars, into that fancy new theater on the corner of Hollywood and Highland, where my LA friends won't be driving around this weekend because, HELLO, Oscar traffic. Up there on the stage to get his Oscar and making sure no one bumps frail little Loki on the head with that Oscar. Those things are heavy.
If you see Mickey, make sure to give him your condolences. Check off his name on your Oscar ballot. Loki up there somewhere, tottering around with all our old friends, having their own Oscar party except featuring Oscar Meyer and bacon, and everyone voting for Mickey.
Did you ever dream that you were a dog agility super champ except then it switched and you were at some germy, grungy, derelict seaside park in the dark and the carnies were actually drug addled zombies that were shambling after you with hammers and their big teeth? And then as you're trying to escape your way out from under their oily, horrible claws by clambering up a rat infested palm tree, you're all, this is about dog agility like, how?
2 comments:
Jeepers, I was already in love with Gustavo (easy to do over the internet, where there is no barking), and then you go and describe him getting upset about dirt in his "soft small dog hair."
I think I'm going to go off in a corner and quietly melt now.
PS Thanks for the Lance report. Better than being there, I'm sure.
I'll tell you. You haven't seen anything til you see him flying around the course, licketdy split, then all of a sudden slam on the brakes, sit down, and start messing with his hair. It's only that special dressage dirt in our dirt nite arena, doesn't happen with normal dirt. Special dressage dirt makes him sad.
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