Today was Day one of the Dog Show. I took a day off work to go! To a partial day.
Let's see. How many errors did I make?
Ruby-in Masters Gamblers we went in the wrong end of the tunnel. But then she did get out to the teeter which didn't matter anymore points wise but made me feel happy inside like a cupcake! And the cupcake had the extra frosting smeared everywhere of that I still had the most points! But the error cost us qualifying. Just like the frosting gives one a fat ass.
She won a big Masters Standard class and qualified though! Go Ruby! She was perfect and I did not make any errors! Hooray for Ruby! She was happy and wild and did exactly what i asked her to. Why? I have no idea, probably to get away from the screaming puppy?
In the Steeplechase, she had the smoking crazy fast time but hit a bar. I take responsibility. Hitting a bar in agility=not good. Hitting a bar in non agility world is a-ok with me. Our time was so fast! But it does not matter when you are hitting the bars. Ruby is like an alcoholic in that way. We need to go to meetings.
Otterpop-Advanced Gamblers-she did great and super speedy but the Gamble had the teeter in it and we know how Otterpop feels about doing the teeter far away from me. She does not feel this. In her heart, it is not a cupcake but a black and rotten and gooey old banana you find behind the seat of a car. Say goodbye to that gamble!
Advanced Standard-Wow so fast and so speedy and where is that scarey old judge (WITCH) standing, near the teeter. On a good day the teeter is ok but on a day with a judge and where earlier I told her to run 30 feet away from me and do it on her own-very, very bad. I put her back on anyways-against the rules, I know but I HAD to do it! Bad, bad, bad agility person and 20 faults for you.
Gustavo-spent the beginning of the morning screaming, screaming as if he was being tortured by a Torture Master of Pain. Every time I ran a dog. I put our tent thing far, far away but he could still see and hear due to super sonic hearing of his breed, the Mexican Song Dog. His songs are so very loud and mournful and cause Torture of Pain to everyone who hears his songs!
On the upside, he exhausted himself after a couple hours of this, and later could go out and play with a rope attached to him and be a very good dog and impress many fine agility masters with his cuteness and ability to Sit for a piece of chese and apparently unusually handsome good looks and confirmation and "fine muscling" (genuine quote of some lady with a dog logo on her shirt). His breeding is causing quite a stir. In fact, he will be genetically swabbed for a border collie DNA study next weekend by someone who does this. Not sure why. Am not mentioning the whole Mexico thing at the moment due to the crazy lady from Jim's seminar lurking nearby, but the coach of the US World Team approves of him so I think we are safe. His only mission at dog shows at this point in his life is to think they are fun and get treats from people and meet people and learn to not make the insane screaming sounds when he sees a dog running that he would rather be chasing.
Did you ever dream that you were a dog agility super champ except then it switched and you were at some germy, grungy, derelict seaside park in the dark and the carnies were actually drug addled zombies that were shambling after you with hammers and their big teeth? And then as you're trying to escape your way out from under their oily, horrible claws by clambering up a rat infested palm tree, you're all, this is about dog agility like, how?
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