Escaping the smoke by going down to some more smoke.

So maybe you heard. Big fire out our way. Maybe you are even holed up at your house with the hose on the roof and everything still packed up, just making sure that sucker ain't jumping Warnella Road. This is a big, ugly, scarey fire. Our home and animals and horses are fine, we're far enough from the fire zone to be safe but a short enough distance away that we're living in a giant smoke cloud. The helicopters are going over right now with their dangling water bags.


I had a rare Saturday afternoon free, and we drove down to Garland Ranch in Carmel Valley, hoping to get away from some smoke. We drove and we drove and we were still in the smoke. Even the smokestacks were in smoke.


Garland Ranch is a huge open space preserve, and being in Carmel, allows dogs to run loose in there on the trails if they're well behaved. Which meant Ruby hiked all afternoon off leash and the other two when it seemed appropriate to let mayhem unleashed. Garland Ranch isn't some deserted forest or beach. It's like upscale hiking. Clint Eastwood probably comes here. And there are mountain lions. Gustavo and Otterpop just don't hike. They RUN. Run run run run run and me and Gary and Ruby are like the boring grownups just walking and the runners just fly around even though it's steep and hot and other people enjoy using the trails without a flying fox and his sidekick flying fruitbat flying off a cliff like right in front of them. Sorry hikers in yoga pants!


It was hot. And just a little bit smokey which was a lot better than the really super smokey I've been working in for the last few days. Part of the hike has stairs going up the side of the waterfall, which probably looks like a real waterfall when it's not fire season and a million degrees outside and there is some water.


I have never seen Gustavo take a break and lay down on a hike. Ever. EVER! We are so coming back here for hiking again.


Maybe don't tell Gary you saw him on the internet, ok? Or he'll never come out hiking w Team Small Dog again.


At the top of the ridge was a water station for dogs and horses. I love Carmel.


Otterpop didn't get the memo that this was a drinking bowl. She just hopped in and wouldn't come out. Poor Ruby. There was also a river down where you park which was perfect for super hot dog swimming so you can put super soaked dogs back in the car. Also lots of poison oak patches for the soaking wet dogs to run in by the river! Right on Team Small Dog!


After we hiked in the valley, we decided to go down to Carmel Beach because, what the hell. Who wants to go to our regular beach where the smoke is? We took the sneaky way by the Carmel Mission because the downside of Carmel is super traffic jammy. Fancy, shiny cars covered in ash traffic jammy.


You have to pay to go in the Carmel Mission. We just stood outside the gate for a minute and looked at it for free. Sort of Bo-ring. Sorry mission. Father Serra built all the missions with slaves from Indians he captured and tortured. You learn all about it if you go to fourth grade in California public schools. And then everyone builds a torture mission out of sugar cubes and paste.


They did have some nice succulents. So we bailed and drove around til we got to the beach. Carmel is beautiful but a little creepy and hygenic and airbrushed looking. I believe this is called Upscale. Everything in Carmel though, a-ok to bring dogs with you. The beach is a lot like our beaches except we go to our beaches before most people are awake or just before they go to bed. When frolicking picnickers are usually drinking moldy beer from a brown bag and a dirty old sleeping bag and tend to have skinny pitbulls. Not like the frolicking, clean picknickers with their poodles and labs and brightly colored cashmere picnic blankets.


No picnics consumed, dogs made even more wet and sandy and brought to brink of exhaustion and everyone then returned to the smoke. The end.