10 April 2009

Silence of the creepy lambs.

So when the alarm went off Thursday morning, the DJ was announcing how county wide, there was no internet or phone service. Sort of a mystery, but it would be up soon. Huh. Weird, but what do you do? Then he played some Beatles songs. And Gustavo jumped onto my head. Thursday morning, Beatles day. How we know what day it is when the alarm goes off bright and way too early. Which is Gustavo's cue. Wake them UP! FAST NOW! By jumping on heads with small feet and licking heads! Well, hell. Not gonna kill me to have a morning with no email, and my cel phone, frequently rings way too much for my taste all day long. Good riddance.

So went off to work, stopped to run the dogs, drove out to the barn. Wow. No one calling. I am so happy. Life must be good. No issues! Total weave pole day for Gustavo. YES. Although, dogwalk contacts have mysteriously disappeared when a tunnel sitting right there next to the dogwalk. Always something. Otterpop practiced some gambles. Has a chance on Sunday again, when we go up to Dixon for the last day of the big 4 day extravaganza everyone else got to go to today. Ruby did a couple jumps. A tunnel. Looked ok.

Get to the barn, and my vet has stopped by and used an old fashioned note written in marker on bright orange post-it, because she couldn't reach me. A note! Imagine that. Me and my large animal vet, usually joined at the hip on our cel phones. I'm going about my day, the cel phone still dead so I don't even have it stuck in my pocket, have no idea what time it is because the clock is my phone and since no one can call me, I am free! Of time! Of space! Of no calling!

As people started to come out to work, we hear the creepy gossip. Someone crawled down a manhole, cut some fiber optic lines that run Santa Cruz county landlines, cel phones, internet, ATM's, 911 calls, you name it, it went down. Santa Cruz and some other close-by cities. Creepy. All of a sudden, the super nice Sound of Silence started to be more Silence of the Lambs and like armageddon. No 911. Credit cards not working at the store. Gas pumps not working. Armed guards in front of the bank. People freaking out!

Like, NOTHING works without the the fibers.

Out at the ranch, we don't have old fashioned phones. We have an emergency, we are outta luck. Usually, everyone carries their cel in their pockets. Have a little worn groove in all my jeans pockets from it. In the right light, maybe you mistake it for the outline of a Skoal can. NO! Is just my phone, which is my whole business office, in that little duct taped, broken hinged, scratched up piece of plastic. So business still runs, I'm still there with the horses but just can't talk with people, which is another big part of my business, I figure out, after a day without talking to anyone I can't see the face of.

It's only in our county and a few other surrounding areas. Just us. We're like the little pocket of incommunicado. Got home, had about half an internet, enough to post this little ditty up but not much more. You probably didn't even notice. Because only some of you live in my county. Most of you, had a day with no armageddon practice. Still checked your emails. Had to answer your calls all day and call everyone back that leaves you a voice mail. Got your cash at the ATM and paid for stuff with a plastic card and put some gas in your car. Me? Jeez louise. You need to call me this week and I don't answer, is cuz I'm out digging a hole for our bunker and stockpiling ammo and canned soup and non genetically modified seed starters. With my helmet on and dressed all in black. When all those lambs go silent in all the counties at the same time one day, stuff going to be more than a little bit weird around here.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ohhh nooo it's much worse...from "The Onion"
Nation's Power Grid Hacked According to The Wall Street Journal, the U.S. electrical grid has been compromised by Russian and Chinese cyber-spies, putting the country's infrastructure at risk. What do you think?
Sharon Brown, Systems Analyst
"These spies must know someone on the inside who revealed America's secret: Everyone here is afraid of the dark."
David Faulkner,Cultivation Manager
“I should have known the filthy Ruskies were behind my electricity getting shut off.”
Joel Comegys,Railroad CraneOperator
"This always confuses me. Does it mean batteries will still work, or no?"