13 April 2008

Sometimes when you're really submissive, you might start peeing all over the place.


OK. Help me out here. You all have been following the saga of Lighthouse Field.

So I am still walking my dogs out there. Not Timmy, and not as much before work, but I take the 3 fast ones out every evening. Me and hardly anyone else. Except there's a new population in the field now. Not the homeless guys, and drunk teenagers, they've been there for a while, but the new dog people.

The ones that are Obeying the New Rules and Walking Their Dogs on a Leash.

Yeah. They take their dog on a walk, in the field, on a leash. Maybe a flexi leash, or maybe a 6 footer. Tied on to their dog. And these ones, maybe will smile at you, maybe avert their eyes. One lady started whimpering at me the other night about how brave I was and that she is scared of the rangers. I told her I really haven't been seeing them in weeks, especially near sundown. She wasn't swayed. Said she couldn't afford the ticket. I told her she can "work it off" with Friends of Lighthouse Field. And no one has actually gotten a ticket yet, that I've heard of at least. She wasn't swayed. She said they were scary when they had told her to put a leash on the first time. She wished me luck and pulled her dog along in it's pinch collar. It was growling. It's bad on a leash.

Then there's a new type. The ones that are smug, and apparently happy about the leash law, and have the gallbladder to say, "Don't you know your dog is supposed to be on a leash now?" It's happened twice. The first time I just kept moving, thinking I must have imagined they said that. Who would say that? In Lighthouse Field?

Last night, a 50ish couple, in LLBeanwear, sturdy shoes and fleece vests, walked by me. Keep in mind, hardly anyone walks in Lighthouse Field anymore, 33 acres of vacant overnight, where once hundreds of people walked their dogs every single day. And this evening, I had seen a few people with their dogs on a leash, one guy and his kid with their dog free, some hippies that looked mightily stoned off their gourds, and some totally inbred looking guys drinking beer and talking about their baseball hats. They liked Gustavo and offered me a beer. I am in the minority out there now. And I didn't stop to drink with the redneck guys.

The LLBean lady says to me, "They're supposed to be on a leash now."

I stopped. I turned around. I looked her dead in the eye.

"Leash. My. Ass." Maybe I said it kinda loud. With dramatic pauses between each word. Tone rising each word. Maybe a smidgey bidgey not so Nice.

They both just looked kind of googly eyed for a count and then they scurried on. They had a big tan dog.

What has happened here that people are just rolling over, belly up, and taking it? I am so totally not getting it. I'm going down clawing and kicking and screaming. It may be a sinking ship but I'll sink with it. And now, the people that like dogs are split into 2 groups. The ones that Obey and the ones that Don't Obey.

It's one thing if someone without a dog that is a tattle tale, rule following type says it. That happened down at the beach one night, and I just said, "Over my dead body am I putting my dogs on a leash down here." I think my tone and the glint in my eye was freaky and they just moved away and left me alone. They had kids. I sounded deranged and manic. They were probably happy it's not a dog beach now, except for the few of us that are ignoring the state's decree. I just grabbed a stick and threw it for the dogs for a long time while they watched.

But when the dog people become speaker phones of the bureaucracy, something is weird. Something is off. Something is upside wrong. It feels like the ship starting to go down. Remember in Titanic and Leonardo DeCaprio is holding on to a chunk of wood and he turns blue and I guess he is saving Kate Winslet or Celine Dion and he dies? Did they save anyone? I forget. That ship sunk. But he hung on til the bitter end, all blue making makeup and all. Good thing I have nice claws.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

It keeps getting worse and worse, you are absolutely right, Team Small Dog. First the back room betrayals (sorry , I don't buy the "We didn't know!" "There's nothing we could have done." "Our hands were tied because it was soooo much money."), then the Rangers with guns. Now Law Abiding Citizens With Their Dogs on Leashes.

The thing about people who keep their dogs on a leashes in a beautiful field or beach is that 1) they are sadistic. (Sorry, but it's true. "Fido, we are at this lovely park/beach!? See the beautiful grassy/sandy expanse?! Smell the lovely other-dog pee-spots? Hear the sound of gophers scritching underground!? --Not for you! Heel!" and 2) 90% of them have never even watched Cesar Milan, let alone gotten a Canine Good Citizen certificate, and so are clueless when it comes to dog handling, which means that their dogs, who would socialize just fine off-leash, are not feeling calm and submissive. Instead, they are feeling irritated and aggressive, and work off their irritation by saying "Yo Mama!" to all the other dogs, which tends to get all the other dogs in trouble. (I mean what are you going to do when someone disses your mama? Duh.)

So, OK, I have been walking down to the micro park and beach nearer my house (which are not off-leash, but no Rangers. so...), but I'll come back and be brave. I'm gonna practice saying, "Leash. My. Ass."

I'll be there Sundays, Tuesdays, Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays about 6:30 p.m. Come get me Rangers and Law Abiding Citizens. Make My Day.

Elf said...

People do this because not everyone is a revolutionary. Not everyone will declare independence from England because they don't want to pay tax for tea. Not everyone will write a letter about mandatory spaying & neutering and go and speak at 3 meetings in different places against it. But some people who do will just get tired of it really fast. People who do (let's say, theoretically, me), just want to perfect their dogwalk contacts--which is stressful because it's not just one step, it's a whole lot of steps that have to be tweaked as you go along and then it all falls apart at a trial anyway-- and work some billable hours--which is stressful because there are deadlines and the material is hard and people aren't responding to questions and besides it's work when you'd rather be working on dogwalk contacts--and maybe process some of the thousands of photos you've taken in the last 3 months--which is stressful because although you like it, it never ends and you have to choose one from among 500 photos of dogs frolicking in the snow as the best of the bunch that maybe you want to put in a frame on your desk--and try to find time to get the dent in your door that someone else put there fixed which now wastes hours and hours of your time and all they did was scratch their bumper but hopefully their insurance rate went up--anyway and then you get zillions of messages about mandatory spaying and neutering and all you want to do is have a few minutes a day when you aren't stressing over something so you can post something entertaining in your blog instead of griping about credit card companies and so if somewhere you used to take your dog off leash is now off limits, it's stressful to take the dog there off leash because (a) LACs (law abiding citizens) repeatedly tell you your business and/or (b) armed troopers tell you your business, and it's also stressful to take your dog *ON* leash because (c) it pisses you off that the dog has to be on leash where you used to be perfectly happy off leash.

So you go somewhere else and do something else because you just don't want any more stress in your life. And let someone else with more energy to burn on this particular stress do it. And keep paying tax on the tea because it doesn't make you lose sleep at night.

Anonymous said...

I've seen where some of the political types get all everyone must be the same and equal ends up being nobody gets to do anything anymore. Like if one person/dog can't play nicely, no one can play at all. The liberal mindset doesn't seem to be liberal at all, but quite the opposite.

Battle on TSD!

Anonymous said...

Now you have me obsessed about Marfa too. I had my husband fascinated by it for hours last night and he found this

http://www.city-data.com/picfilesv/picv15619.
php

Is it real? Otherwise there is nothing in Marfa, 100 miles from the interstate. Plenty of room to train agility, don't know how you'd ever get to a trial

team small dog said...

The roadside Prada is some art.

Urban Smoothie Read said...

things is getting worst in the place where we hike everyweekend...

all of a sudden there is this 'no dogs allowed sign'..

so ppl came forward n say in my face "i thought dogs are not allowed anymore"..., while my dog is roaming freely in the woods...

ok, i know a ticket my be awaiting me

Anonymous said...

hey now I'll make you really paranoid because I've seen situations where the Men In Black are really online in force with lying so deep that it makes your head spin. Basically by our actions in the US as a whole, we've created the situation where no one trusts no one. It's like the main goal of our society is now fomenting paranoia and submission as you say.

My main point is don't post the exact times you walk your dogs. Don't make it easy for them.

But keep Team Small Dog the double-blind-authenticated trust depot! or we'll all curl up and drink the kool aid.

team small dog said...

OK. Now I am all freaked out that Anonymous is a MIB aka State Parks Ranger and now we all have to move to another blog. Do State Parks Rangers say words like fomenting?

And if Anonymous is a Ranger, then we definitely can't say times we are out there with no Rangers. Which is what the Rangers want.

Crap. Is that the Double Blind Authentication?