05 February 2008

Overheard in the liquor store.

Another picture in Turlock.

So I was standing in line at the liquor store. The guy behind me was a tall guy, kind of your basic, Santa Cruz guy in a surfwear t-shirt that was all faded and jeans and flip flops. Like I would be not surprised to see him show up at my house to bid on a roof or sheetrock stuff in his big truck. He was probably my age or maybe older. It is weird that tall guys with gray hair in their '40s are now my age but they are. Probably once he was younger too.

Another tall guy comes in. He is a little grayer and was wearing ugg boots and had a moustache but they were basically the same guy. He grabbed a 6 pack and got in line.

First guy says, "Dude! It's been a while. Wassup?"

Second guy says, "Just gonna go chill with my girl."

First guy says, "Cool. Your wife?"

Second guy says, "Nah. Just my girl."

First guy says, "Right on. Your daughter?"

Second guy says, "Naw. Just my girl."

First guy says, "But not your wife?"

Second guy says, "Naw dude. I'm separated now. But I have this killer, beautiful girlfriend."

First guy says, "Yeah. Right on."

Second guy says, "But it's chill and everything. Like we totally get along. We kept the house. I just went over there and helped her fix some stuff and hang with the kids and like it was totally cool. It's really rad."

First guy says, "Yeah. That's cool. It's cool when you can not sell the house and shit. When I got separated we sold that house and that sucked."

Second guy says, "Yeah. It's like totally cool and my girlfriend is really rad and it's all workin' out good."

I can't remember exactly what else but it kind of kept going like that and then I had a hard time telling which one was first guy talking and which one was second guy talking because they started turning into the same guy.

Then I thought, what if one of those guys was standing behind me talking to some other dog agility lady at a liquor store. Except the ladies are wearing muddy pants and rain jackets and goretex shoes and have really messy hair. And neither of them is very tall. But they are in their 40's.

First lady says, "We had a great trial this weekend except my dog kept knocking bars." (You can substitute missing dog walk contact, running out of ring, slowing down in weave poles, bailing on the teeter, etc).

Second lady says, "Oh yeah, my dog kept bailing on the teeter (You can substitute missing dog walk contact, running out of ring, slowing down in weave poles, knocking bars, etc) and it just sucked."

First lady says, "Oh, my other dog used to do that. We had to totally retrain it. Yeah, I'm really wondering about the bars right now."

Second lady says, "Oh that sucks. Has she been knocking bars a lot? My dog has been bailing on the teeter a lot lately."

First lady says, "Yeah, I really wonder about them. We are going to have to do some retraining. Or maybe she's sore."

And then it kind of keeps going like that and probably the tall guy in the surfwear out and flip flops can't tell which lady is which because they turned into the same lady.


Elf said...

I get that weird creepy feeling of "I hope no one's listening" every time I catch myself discussing dog poop and pooping habits and pooping locations with other dog people: "Is this really ME saying all this? What happened to my liberal arts education?"


team small dog said...

Right? Like I can tell you WAY more about 2x2 weave pole entry training than the whole Indian Casinos propositions.